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Tony's Lay Guide:

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Leech off someone else's crash and burn

This one is simple. You see a guy hitting an a girl and stalling, doing a crash and burn, getting shot down - in other words failing miserably. The guy leaves with his tail between his legs mumbling "Bitches" to himself. You move in. If you overheard them talk, you can say: "That must have been the worst pick-up line I've ever heard:)". Or if you didn't: "That must have been one of the most pathetic approaches I've ever seen". BOOM! She cracks up laughing - she has found a soul-mate, someone who feels exactly the same way, who understands, someone she can share all the ridicule she has for that poor underachieving AFC and all the scorn she has for his performance. You are instantly in a heated discussion with her about all the dumb approaches she has encountered and pick-up lines she has heard with rapport rising like fever:) She will drop all her shields, because out of all people, you, having approached the way you did, CAN NOT POSSIBLY BE TRYING TO DO A PICK-UP on her:) Hehe:) 

A variation of this - you see a guy hitting an a girl and she is obviously uncomfortable about it, maybe even to the point of disgust. But the guy is still staying - either the girl is just too sweet to tell him to f_ck off, or the guy is a true obnoxious a-hole. Or both. Either way, you move in. "Oh here you are! Christina darling, I've been looking all over for you! We had to be at Tanya's house like half an hour ago already, come on! (or whatever BS, you get the idea:)" If the guy looks at you with a big "What the f_uck!?!" face, say in a matter of fact voice and not even looking in his direction "'scuse me, this is my girlfriend". Now take the girls hand and pull her away. She is dumbfounded to do anything herself but once she realises, what just happened... she realises that you're are her saviour! Her hero! She'll do anything anything anything for you (not bad huh:). 


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